Dumbass Questions Deserve Smartass Answers

I hate life.

I absolutely hate life. I’m tired of it. I’m not tired of living, but I am tired of life. I know that compared to a lot of people in this world, I’m damn lucky, so I don’t want this to come off as me thinking my life is so hard compared to everyone else, because I know it’s not. A friend of mine described in a way one time that I really liked. She said, “Everyone has their own devils. Some are worse, but that doesn’t make yours not valid.” 
That being said, I’m just sick of where my life is right now, which is why I do so much to escape it. Reading books, watching movies, playing video games, playing sports, to a lesser extent, listening to music, and more frequently now, drinking. They’re all little escapes from reality for me in one way or another. When I read a book or watch a movie or play a video game, I get to be in another world for a little bit, get to be someone else for a while. I can pick up Eragon and travel to Alagaesia for a few hours, or put in The Avengers and hang out in the Marvel Universe for 2 hours and 23 minutes, or pick up a controller and become Master Chief for a while. Music isn’t as much of an escape, because too often it just reminds me of why I want to escape in the first place. I’ve also started drinking this year, and the main reason I like it so much is because I don’t have to be me when I do. I get to be a much more happy, care-free, happy-go-lucky version of me. When I drink, I don’t worry about whether people are judging me or pretending to like me, because I don’t care. That’s the hardest part about waking up in the morning, is knowing I have to go through life again and again. I need something to change for the better, because there’s only so much escaping I can do.